This last weekend we used these two videos to teach part of the message in HSM. It is the first time we tried to integrate videos in the teaching, but I thought it went really well. Students seemed to love it and remember it.
Archives For service programming
As much fun as ministry is and can be there always is a time in which you need to confront a student with life choices they are making or they are being disruptive in service. Let’s be honest, no one loves confrontation. It can be very hard at times. Even though it’s tough it is important in ministry to handle conflict with students well. A confrontation handled well can help launch them into the next level of personal growth in life and with Jesus. A confrontation handled badly can cause way more damage to the situation than their was before you entered into the situation. Hence, the importance of handling conflict well.
I have had quite a few times where I have needed to confront and I thought I would write down some practical tips in doing so, and doing so well that is beneficial to both parties:
- Pray before- Seems obvious but if I do forget to one thing the most, it’s this one. It’s so easily overlooked but it really is the most important. There is nothing better than going into what can be a very difficult conversation than going in knowing that you went before the King and gave Him the situation before you even began with the student. I pray that He gives me the correct words to say in ministering to the student and discernment when counseling them.
- Be up front- There is no use to dancing around the situation. I would always try to “warm them up” before actually getting to the meat. As soon as they sit down, I lovingly let them know that I want to talk about something that can be hard to hear but it important because I love and care for them, then I go into it.
- Be on their side- Confrontation is exactly that when two people are going head to head. If you can’t confront someone with love and with a positive end in mind for them (redemption, restoration, growth), you shouldn’t be confronting them in the first place. Remind them of this as well—that you’re on their side—and that you want to see this issue resolved in a way that everyone learns and grows through it.
- Go in private- Go in private according to Matthew 18:15. A one-on-one conversation. If you cannot overlook the issue then attempt to resolve the conflict or misunderstanding by applying God’s principle of going one on one whenever possible. There is no benefit in calling them out in front of their friends after service or small group about something they have been doing (Finish reading Matthew 18 if one-on-one doesn’t get through).
- When it gets heated, slow down -When things get heated it can be really easy to get revved up with them. The other week a had a student sit all the way in the back of the room when their was plenty of seats closer. We had the entire back blocked off and I went over and kindly asked him if he would be willing to move up to join us. With a rude response back that took me off-guard I asked him again to come up just to the last row of the blocked off area at least. More disrespect back, yelling back at me at this point about how he did not want to be there and didn’t know anyone and to leave him alone. I didn’t. Instead, I took a breath, sat down next to him, eye level, calmly said, “Have you ever thought the reason why you don’t know anyone is because you sit all the way back here? If you want to know people, I know almost everyone here, I will literally walk around and introduce you to everyone we come in contact with. Then you will be the most popular guy here. Even more popular than me. I’m not trying to be “that guy” to make you do something but I’m just asking you to move up a few rows so you’re not the only one back here.” With a different attitude, he said, “My name is Even” shook my hand and moved up. And after service we went around meeting people. It was awesome.
- Point Them To Jesus- Overall, you are to point them to Jesus. As ministers that is what we are supposed to do. We need to use these times of confrontation as teaching and learning for our students and for us as pastors as well. If we can leave the conversation with the students leaning on Jesus more, than it is a success.
What else would you put? Add to the list?
Small groups is what HSM life comes out of. If HSM could only do one thing with our student ministry, it would be small groups, it is that important. This is why we push it so hard to our students because we really believe that real life change happens in small groups because they will have the strong community around them as they experience Jesus.
Here is one of many videos we did to promote our Life Groups:
Not every day is an easy day in student ministries. Anyone the is even two months in on a good internship can tell you that. Well, today was a day and a half for me. While I won’t go into why, I will go into what I learned from this difficult day. Anyone can choose to do a tough day alone, with Jesus, or with their spouse. Occasionally, going it alone will be okay, other times, one may suffer for choosing to go solo. Moreover, moving through a difficult day with a team can also be varied in a few key ways. Recently, the team that I am a part of, has been faced with a couple of rocky days- emergencies with students, families, and each other; all things that are normal in any church environment.
However, today was different in that the whole team was in the office, and we all dealt with the emotion of the situation at the same time. For us, timing was key.
I learned a few things today:
- It’s good to have a team that has your back. Maybe your team is made up of staff in your department, or maybe it’s your church staff working as a team, or maybe your team is made up of elders and veteran volunteers. Any of those options can make a great team. If you don’t have a team, find one! If you feel there is a rift in your team right now, be part of the solution to fix it!
- Moments of honesty are healthy. You need to have moments where you can speak freely with your team. Be wise and don’t let this become gossip, because we all know that it can. However, as a team, with trust and confidentiality, you should be able to be honest. Speak your mind, vent if you have to. If you don’t have some one to vent to, find someone pronto!
- It’s good not be a workaholic. While I am sure that the idea of being a workaholic is a blog post all in itself, being part of team and having people in your life that don’t let you become a “non-stop worker” is a good thing. It means they care for you and don’t want to see you burn out. Listen to them, and be willing to speak it back to them if need be.
- It’s good to laugh together. After our tough day, I sent a funny video around to everyone in hopes that they would laugh. The winning idea is that there will be more bad days, not just one, not just ten, but MANY. So if you take every shot personally, if you let it be the issue on every team members mind, your doing a disservice to the team. Have fun- you know fun right! We all need to have that now and then, especially after a bad day.
- It’s necessary to take time to process. Whether the struggles are related to volunteer leaders, students, or parents, make sure that you know the process or chain-of-command, to make sure that you not making it up as you go along. When tough things happen, it is easy to be flustered and shocked, especially if it really is unexpected. I know that every situation is different, but guess what, if you have some idea of what to do in a given situation, you at least have a starting point or a lead staffer that can delegate what needs to be done.
What do you think? What am I leaving out? What do you do after a bad day at the office? Share some tips and tricks for other youth workers like me to use for next time. Trust me, there will be a next time, the only question is- Will you be prepared?
Justin Herman (@heyjustinherman) is currently serving as the Director of Ministry for Jr. High at Mariners Church (@marinerschurch) in Irvine, CA. Mariners is a large multi-campus church serving the people and needs of orange county. Their vision is, “transforming ordinary people, into passionate followers of Jesus, courageously changing the world.” He has been in youth ministry for eight years in various roles from intern to full time. His passion is students. You can connect with Justin on Twitter (http://www.twitter.com/HeyJustinHerman) or on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/heyjustinherman) or follow his blog (http://heyjustinherman.com<http://heyjustinherman.com/>)
If you have not seen the Korean music video “Gangnam Style“… you probably do not have a computer or a TV because it has over 200,000,000 views on Youtube, it has been on SNL, Ellen and probably has been played in every student ministry in the nation (I wouldn’t be surprised to be honest because it’s super catchy).
We just had our fall kick-off and our students wanted to do our opener with this song. They did a “translation” of the words as well. They went all out and it was so fun. So here it is:
Sometimes an idea for a sermon series just comes to me, so I quickly write them down in my notebook. Who knows if they will ever be used in our ministry, but hopefully by me sharing what I have thought of and seen, maybe they can spark something in another ministry in order to be used to spread Jesus to students. Let the brain begin to work!
- False God
- Hello, My Name is… Jesus
- The Walking Dead
- Impossible God (God works in impossibles)
- Crosswords
- UnChristian (based off the book)
- Explicit
- Love Out Loud
- Old School (Old Testament Stories)
- Real House Wives of the Bible
- Dialoge vs. Monologe (prayer)
- In It For the Prophets
- Try Me
- Prisoner, Pioneer, Preacher (Paul)
- (Un)Comfort Zone
- Scale The Walls
- The Forum (Asking Questions)
- Sit Down, Stand Up, Step Out
- Lamb, Lion, Lord
- Moments (God speaks in moments)
- Thou Shalt…
- Reputation: Not Just Yours Is One the Line
- Secrets
- I Have Never…
- Tamed Temptation
- Can God Really?
- House of Prayer
- Pawn Stars (Jesus wants more than collateral)
- Seeds
- Keeping It Real
- Broken Yet Beautiful
- Too Close For Comfort (Closer to God you become, the more uncofortable we are called to be)
- Prayer Is…
- Handle What’s Handling You
- Clay, Potter, Masterpiece
- Free At Last
- Spiritual Shipwreck
If this sparks something for your ministry, let me know! I would love to hear what did with it!
Here is a great funny video we made for our services last week. A few weeks ago I posted a blog on wanting to do video announcements in HSM (click HERE if you want to check that out). But we made one for this last weekend and it was received well. Instead of doing announcements from the stage, like usual, we did it on video and it is way more entertaining. I’m looking forward to making some more for our weekend services.
I know one thing that kills a service is too many announcements. You can have a great service planned, but have too much time standing in front of the students will destroy the momentum you just built.
That is why if you can use video announcements, it can help out in ways that you would never really think of.
- They actually pay attention- Because our (I say our because I would say I’m included in it, I’m 25) is obsessed with media. The first announcement video I ever did was a friend and I just sitting in front of the camera, saying everything we would have said on stage, but just on video. The difference? The room was so quiet and every student’s eyes were glued to the screen.
- It can add a great element to your service- As time went on, I got more and more creative with the videos. Some were informational, some were funny, some were stupid. But it can be a great way to get information you need to have but in a fun way that they will remember and make your service look awesome.
- It can get more people involved in the service- Video allows more people to be involved in the service. Whether they are in the video, shooting or editing the video, they are now involved in the service. I would have leaders, students, staff all be a part certain videos. Lt’s be honest, who doesn’t like to see their face on screen?
Here are some videos I have done in the past with announcements from my previous church. Feel feel to steal any ideas. I’ll post more later as well, I have a whole arsenal of them.
A couple of weeks ago, we met to lay out our Fall series schedule for Saddleback High School Ministry. What came to the table was amazing. Here are just a few that we considered. Hope these help in any way or spark some ideas for some amazing series. Our fall series is still being worked on, so I’m sure we will get them up soon:
- Do Something
- Taboo: What Church Isn’t Talking About
- Things Jesus Didn’t Say
- Grace Mob
- Brotherly Love (cross out love, over it “wars”)
- How To Survive High School Guide
- Identity Theft
- YOLO
- Irrestistible Revolution
- Life Apps (going off the iPhone. Could be fruits fo the Spirit or the Bible is the first and best app)
- I Want Your…
- Poser
- Can You Hear Me?
- Rewind
- WWID? – What Would I Do?
- I am _______________
- Jesus: Liar, Lunatic or Lord
- I Am Legend
- Abandon Ship! – abandon sin, self
- Wasted – Growth, Heaven, Hypocrisy, Possessions
- Forever Alone
- God is…
- Eyes Wide Shut
- He > I
- > Greater Than
- Booty. God. Booty (From a blog post of Jon Acuff)
- Nothing – God makes something out of nothing. If you are nothing, God can make something out of you
- AWE/SOME – God is awe/all, we are some
- Get Dirty
- IDK (I Don’t Know)
- Things Jesus Did Say
If something sparks you that creates another amazing series, let me know! I would love to hear what you came up with as well!
Having a service to help students experience Jesus is only half the equation. As some would believe they would think the most important part of our weekend services would be the services because they are the main reason why students come. The most important part, the most crucial part of our weekend services are the 15 minutes before and after each of the services. This is where the real ministry happens.
Here is why I think they are so important:
- 15 minutes before and after the service is prime hang out relational time. This is where all leaders should be out and about talking and meeting people left and right. This time is the time where students are there waiting for service to start or they are hanging out after the service just ended.
- 15 minutes before service is a prime time to meet new students because they are just there. They are not going anywhere, only inside service. If you meet a new student, you can offer to sit with them and talk more.
- 15 minutes after service everyone just hangs out and talks. You can mingle and talk about the service and what it meant to them.
- 15 minutes after the service is where real conversation and prayer takes place. It is where a student it touched by something in the service and you are able to talk and pray with them.
- 15 minutes before and after service is just a nig hang out sesh. This is the time to joke and play and really get a chance to know how students are outside of church and it allows them to see who you are as well. Conversation is the first step to connection.
15 minutes before and after service is where the real ministry happens. Services expose students to Jesus, the relationships before and after services literally show Jesus’ love to the students through conversation and relationship. To not jump on this time would be wasteful.
